REJECTION: The Verbal Abuser
By Tigress Luv, author of How to Get Over a Breakup (and Rejection)
"When you think about the immensity of the universe, you can see how really small the person is that you are crediting with being the 'be-all' to your life." ~Tigress Luv
Rejection makes us doubt ourselves. It makes us feel insecure, not good enough, can't measure up, dejected, cast aside, and not worthy.
But the one thing we don't see about it, is the one thing we should ... it should make us feel grateful that we have removed this one person from our life so that we may now go forth and find our true soul mate; one who is better suited to us.
The funny thing is that when we allow ourselves to feel 'less than' someone else, based upon their acceptance or rejection of us, we are actually manifesting a 'power' in them. We are giving them far more value as a human being than we are giving ourselves.
Let me ask you this? Have you ever sat there and called a tree names? Told the tree it wasn't worthy of you? That the tree was a failure as a 'tree'? No, you haven't. Why? Because just how long are you going to talk to a tree? A second, a minute? Even a nano-second? When the tree doesn't respond you would eventually get bored of it and turn away; you'd stop talking to it.
But what if the tree responded? What if it got mad, or started crying, or called us names back? What if the tree begged us to please, please, please accept it as a worthy 'tree'? Would we feel powerful? Would we feel ashamed? Would we think less of the tree for allowing us to manipulate its own feelings of self-worth? Understandably, we would each feel different depending on our underlying personality, but, for the most part, we would all feel somewhat 'superior' to the tree simply because we could control it. We held power over the tree's emotions and feelings. We felt powerful over being deemed a suitable judge of trees.
Unless the tree rejected us back. Unless the tree moved on to be happier with one of our own. Then we would feel inferior, rejected ... stupid.
What this means is that we all want to be 'heard' and by valuing another's opinions you are making them feel powerful. Without your validation they would not have power, their words would fall on empty air. So why do you give value and power to others' words?
Still, rejection is such a powerfully crushing emotion that it is found as the overriding reason in so many suicides. However, rejection only matters if you accept it. You have the ability to 'reject' rejection. You have the intelligence to not give someone else the divine power of being a suitable judge of you or your worth. You don't have to accept rejection. While nobody likes being snubbed or excluded, it really should only hurt us if we place unwarranted truth and unearned power to other people's opinions.
You can snub and exclude rejection!
~ Today I will see that nobody is better than I am. I am just as valuable, and as worthy, as every other person on the planet, and nobody has the divine power to be my judge.
Today I will take rejection and laugh at it. For rejection is just a useless, intangible opinion from one person; an opinion that actually frees me to a better life with a more worthy and more suitable person.
Just for today I will be grateful for the rejection in my past, for it freed me up and left me one step closer to the 'real thing', my true soul mate. Today I will be grateful that those who were not meant to be are out of the way so that those who are meant to be may now enter my life. ~
Advice on Breakups
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